Double Fisted

by Kris Pitcher

Move over Big Gulp!

It's already rolled out in several states and boy is Starbucks proud to present their newest creation to the masses! It used to be that in order to get your full sized fix you had to frequent the likes of 7-eleven. No offense to those of you who like a bargain on those hot dogs, two for $2 is a screaming deal. But it's no high brow coffee spot, I don't care how many flavors of that creamer they have.

Deep down I know you love the way you have to double fist the Big Gulp. The size of that 32 ounces in your mitts...the giant straw. Brings back summer time, young romance, and self-propelled transportation. Am I right? Hello roller skates, grab your money honey, we're skating to 7-eleven!

Tell me you have a cup holder for that bad boy in your car? My sensible German engineered vehicle has a cup holder for maybe an espresso shot...but nothing larger. So, when Starbucks goes nationwide in May with their 31 oz. Trenta, pull over and get ready to double fist a behemoth of velvety cold liquid relief. It's 916 ml of icy goodness. Did you know the adult stomach capacity on average is only 900 ml. That's a relief, if you over do it with your Trenta, you have a barf vessel. 

Reportedly, the Trenta "only" packs 230 calories for a sweetened iced coffee. But the spokesperson didn't say how many calories the Mocha Frappuchino has...they're giving insulin shots with that one (kidding people!).

Well, I guess bigger IS better. Starbucks has proven it. I do worry about the more slight employees bending out the drive-thru window with the Trenta - making that careful hand off. It's a lot to handle. You might want to make sure you've got a roll of paper towels in your rig. Certainly, you're not going to drink that in the store...you'd be there a while - double fisted, your hands frozen to your ginormous Trenta. I know some of you will get one. All I can say is...Be careful...