Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Duh! Just Be You!

by Kris Pitcher

Flipping through a magazine, it recommended - don't be anyone but you. Duh! I thought. But it's not a duh moment for millions of women, and men alike.

Most people, most of the time are trying to be anyone but themselves. In fact, you is the last person you'd like to be!

Well, that's great advice. Just be you. Don't be anyone but you. We don't need to look for a new style every season. We should find a personal style which suits us, and keep it. Feel comfortable in it. Rock it!

Keeping up with everyone, or with what you think you need to be doing can be exhausting. And come to find out, no one really cares. No one is going to notice if you skip the seasonal table settings? Or, if you just carve the standard face into your pumpkin instead of making a masterful art piece out of it. It's. A. Pumpkin.

There's nothing wrong with doing all that if it's you. But it seems people get all caught up in the rush of being and doing what others are doing and being. Just be you. Seems simple.

When it comes to being you, stop apologizing. No apologies are needed. Ever. Take those compliments. Simply take them. Don't take them with the requisite apology about how you don't deserve them. When someone compliments you...you say, "Thank you!" Period.

As we approach the holiday season, it seems like a good time to reflect inward and think about who we are. It's a great time to consider what's important to us and whether or not we are honoring that in our lives. Are we being ourselves?

I'm going to take that advice - Duh! Just be me. Being anyone else would just be silly?! How about you? Who will you be?  

Monday, October 29, 2012

On Shaping Change

by Kris Pitcher

Something really obvious occurred to me while I was watching Bath Crashers, walking up an incline on the treadmill focusing on my glute/hamstring tie in...

You have to shape your change, if you want to change your shape. Go ahead, read that line again. I'm not sure if another philosophical thought this big will come to me again soon.

What I mean is, it's not going to happen to you, or for you, you must shape the change in your life that is going to get you to your goals. I see a lot of people sitting around waiting for it to "happen". It's never going to happen.

How do you shape your change? You decide. You begin. You pick a place and get started. And then you keep going. It won't be perfect. It doesn't have to be 100% all the time, every time. You're human after all. You'll make mistakes.

But it's the change, the momentum, the movement - figuratively and literally - that you must shape. You do that. No one, no thing, no force does that for you. You shape your change. And your shape changes. Period.

And then someone got a new bathroom. But that only happens on TV. There's very little difference between those who succeed at weight management, at meeting their goals, at competing, and those who don't.

That little difference, however...is whether or not they choose to shape their change. I wonder what you'll choose? I wonder if it seems as obvious to you? It makes me kind of excited to think you might find it simple enough to just begin, to shape your change.

Friday, October 26, 2012

Running Through My Head - Grunt!

by Kris Pitcher

There is no delicate way to lead in to this topic. No polite way to begin. So, here we go...What is with all the grunting in the gym?

I understand the physical exertion. I am myself a heavy lifter. But the grunting and groaning sounds...like something else to me.

Maybe you're not aware of WHAT it does sound like. It doesn't sound like super human exertion doing arm curls with the 20's (I can do that). And here's the lack of delicacy. Ready?

It sounds like you're either trying to get a part in an adult movie - which will go straight to video. Or, like maybe you haven't had a bowel movement for several days. Either way, you shouldn't be making those sounds in the gym.

It's really the guys I'm concerned for. That sort of sound means thoracic pressure, and I'm concerned for your blood pressure. Besides, my CPR isn't completely current. I wish you would just breathe through the exercise. Exhale! (But without the noise?)

The second part of my concern is that the weight isn't that heavy. If a 40 something lady can lift it...you don't need to make that sound while you're doing it. We can see you. We're proud of you. It's not necessary to draw that kind of attention to yourself.

Lastly, it makes me wonder what kind of noise you make in the bedroom. And I just can't erase those kinds of thoughts from my mind. I feel like it's not really my fault either. They are after all, your grunts. Yucky!

You don't want me wondering that sort of thing. And if you're wondering why I'm laughing audibly, now you know what's running through my head. Grunt!

My suggestion is we focus on the mind body connection of the lift. Focus on the breathing - exhaling as we exert. Quietly. I can't help but think this method would be better for most involved, most of the time. Happy lifting!

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Strange Gluten

by Kris Pitcher

I wasn't sure from their sideways stares if maybe they couldn't smell gluten in my lipstick? But the women in the Gluten Free Bake Shop made me feel like a visitor to a foreign land.

Or, maybe it was the dress I was wearing covered up by my suit jacket. In comparison to their jeans, smocks and bare tattooed arms, I did stick out like a sore thumb. They continued to scurry about casting sideways glances. A friendly voice caught my ear but I couldn't place where it was coming from.

Sitting at an out of place desk behind what should have been a customer counter was a pleasant man with very well groomed eyebrows. He chattered on about the items they had, the farms they buy from, and their box delivery program.

"Are you gluten intolerant?" He quizzed me with a smile. Caught off guard I told the truth. I confessed that I was not, but I eat a mostly gluten free diet. He was happy with that and went on to tell me about their organic ingredients.

The decor was a mix of cast away house plants, country grocery, with a children's sitting area. A mish-mash of "where am I supposed to go" and "what is this place" swirled in my head.

By that point I felt like I had to buy something from this strange place in order to leave without a voodoo spell cast on me. Settling on some southwest pepper crisps I took them to him to pay for my purchase.

"Oh, you pay over there." He said pointing to the back of the store where the ladies were bustling in their head scarves in the kitchen. He hurried around from his counter, where he revealed to also be wearing a dress. Turns out he is a she, well blossoming anyway.

He was the only nice lady in there. She helped me with my purchase and smiled while the others scowled, not looking directly at me. I couldn't figure out if it was my lipstick, or my dress, or my sisterhood with their tranny that bothered them.

The whole thing was a little strange and cult-like. I'm sure there's not a gluten free cult you have to join first. But if I ever go back there, I sure hope s/he's there. In the meantime, I'm enjoying my crisps!  

Monday, October 22, 2012

How Much Can You Bench?

by Kris Pitcher

I see posts about PRs or PBs...those refer to personal records or personal bests. (Not to be confused with PB & J. That's much different.)

This new trend stands to reason with the latest fad programs stressing how much and how many of certain things you can perform. Not to pick on anyone. Group programs come and they go throughout the life span of the industry.

I have to laugh when someone asks us in the gym, "Hey, how much can you bench?"  The thing is, we don't bench at all in the sense they mean. Flat barbell bench - nada. Don't do it. We just need to look like we do.

No PRs there! The PR is how long has my husband been able to rehab his torn shoulder without surgery followed by taking a year off for recovery. The PB is how long has he been pain free AND able to lift and continue competing.

My point is, what is the PURPOSE of your exercise? As you collect your personal bests for this and for that...what it the purpose of that. If you have one, great! Gaining strength in an exercise for a specific reason is great. Or just the purpose of "getting the lift" in that exercise is fine too.

Whatever your reason - fine by me - just have one. Which leads me back to the question, how much can you bench? What difference does it make? Incline, yes. Smith, yes. Dumbbell, yes. Cable, yes. Fly, yes. Every variation/combination/inclination/etc. in between...yes. But flat barbell bench, no.

The person asking that question will always have a story about how he used to lift more, but he got injured. This is the point in his story when he pats his belly and tells how things went to pot after that. It's the same every time, clockwork.

If you're happy with your PRs and PBs good for you. If you're not sure why you're collecting them, it might be time to reconsider your plan. What is the purpose? Me? I'm going to find a PB... & J.

Friday, October 19, 2012

Keep it Fun, Sized

by Kris Pitcher

They're popping up everywhere. The wear house stores have ensured we will not run out this year. And reportedly seven out of ten of us will spend on average $80 this Halloween. As a nation we will spend $8 billion on this holiday. Praise the retail gods. Wow.

Much of that is spent on costumes, scary decor and the requisite fake blood. But we spend a lot on fun sized (and full sized) candy. So, what will all that fun cost you this season? Let's look at some of our favorite fun sized bars:

  • Snickers 72 calories
  • Twix 80 calories
  • 3 Musketeers 65
  • Kit Kat 100 calories
  • Butterfinger 100
  • Milky Way 75 calories
  • Nestle Crunch 70
  • 20 pieces of Candy Corn 150 calories
A couple of things happen with these tiny treasures of fun. You want to try them all. I just listed a few. There are MANY more. And why not taste them all? You also lose track of how many pieces of fun you've had. So, your 75 calories quickly becomes 712 if you try ONE of each of the above.

You might as well main line me right up because once I've had one...I want to keep the fun coming. Lots of people just can't stop once they've started. And with a bite sized piece, you really don't feel like you're doing that much damage.

The damage adds up, and quickly. There are some things you can do to manage your own behavior at work and at home. At home my best advice is wait to buy the candy. The mega store is not going to run out.

If it is in the house, you're going to eat it. If you really live in a place where they will run out and all that will be left is Jolly Ranchers...buy it now and seriously PUT IT AWAY. It's not for you in so many ways. You are the only one who is going to control your home environment.

When you are away from home you need to make some decisions and have some tools. One good tool is sugar free gum. It's kind of gross to pull the gum out of your mouth and hold it while you eat a snickers bar. Your mouth is already busy. Chomp away. It's a good tool.

Drink lemon water, or lemon tea, and eat your regular meals on schedule. Keeping yourself on track helps your body know it's getting what it needs. It doesn't need a kit kat. When you are getting the protein, fat and carbs you are supposed to eat, you won't be craving sugar.

Decide. Make your decision ahead of time. If you'll be in an environment where you know those fun sized items will be tempting you...decide ahead of time how you will handle it. You are prepared, not caught off guard. Hello! There's gonna be stuff at the pot-luck! Plan ahead.

Not getting fat sized from fun sized is easy when you know what you're dealing with and when you make decisions about your choices. No one is forcing you to participate in Trick-or-Treating. Are they? Keep it fun!


 

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

I Got Flashed!

by Kris Pitcher

I got flashed this summer. I didn't ask for it to happen. In fact, I wasn't even aware it happened until after. To be honest...I didn't even realize it was possible.

And I haven't been the same since! My husband had to explain what had happened. I was so clueless. Did you know there is a computer inside your car telling your engine to under perform? Lame! So, my husband had mine "flashed".

What? What did you think I was talking about?

Now, in my unassuming car I can race people off the line, jockey people into their lanes on the freeway and basically wreak havoc in my own 40-something kind of way. I'm high performance!

I guess what I'm wondering is what's telling you to under perform? What's holding you back? What "programming" will it take to get you to meet your high performance potential?

All valid questions as the days get darker, colder and shorter. We stack on the sweaters and hide for the duration of the winter. Heck I've pretty much stopped shaving my legs...

OK, I haven't, but things can turn ugly over the winter as the holidays are about to begin in pure domino fashion and the eating begins. Now is as good a time as any for you to get "flashed"! Why not kick up your performance when it matters?

The excuses are already building...Halloween is just around the corner. This candy is really for the kids. November starts on a Thursday - no one starts a plan on a Thursday. I'll wait until after Thanksgiving...pretty soon it's the New Year and you haven't shaved your legs!

Ugly. Turn up your performance now. No use in waiting. I'm certainly not waiting. I can't! Not with all this horsepower! Stay right except to pass, we've been flashed!



Monday, October 15, 2012

Public Service Acronym

by Kris Pitcher

Acronyms are great. The organization I am with has more acronyms than the military and sometimes I still need a translator. But recently I thought of a great acronym for every day use.

Now, they are great for learning. Any time you need to memorize something, or recall information, using them as a tool is super smart. This isn't for that purpose at all. It's for you to manage whether, or not, you should "comment".

Life is a great social experiment, but for those of us who have found our social platform on social media...OK, facebook, we are part of the greatest experiment of all. And as such, I have developed a new acronym.

It's creation was sparked as I would read people's comments on other people's posts. For instance, a post might read, "I got my flu shot today! Ready for a healthy winter!"

I'll be darned in socks if someone doesn't comment about how they don't "believe" in getting inoculated and how this person is perpetuating some Big Brother scam.

KITYS - When you are considering commenting on someone's post think about kitties. But not the fuzzy, meow-y kind. Think about KITYS - my new acronym.

Keep  It  To  Your  Self

Yes. Keep it to your self people. KITYS need to take over the social media platform and potentially the world. This person doesn't need a guilt trip about their flu shot. They aren't trying to create a political mud slinging throw down with you. They just want to get through the season without contracting the flu.

And I see this stupid "badgering" all the time. It's bullying for grown ups. It's being too emotional about your "positions". Who cares? Who cares if someone else has a different view point? Isn't that what makes this world work?

I know you want to be heard, to be right, and to have the last comment. But please for the sake of all think of KITYS every time you make a "comment". Thank you for taking time to read this public service acronym message. Now comment, and "share" it *smile!




Friday, October 12, 2012

Get Stacked! The Right Supplements!

by Kris Pitcher

You have done your research and you are in this thing deep! You bought the big stack designed especially for you. It's got your morning supplements, your pre workout complex, something to drink during your workout, the best post workout recovery and your night time repair complex. Your stack is even stacked!

And let me just tell you why all that isn't going to get you stacked like the "literature" in the magazine, or on the website, said it would. Because you won't eat your food.

That's right. You won't eat your food. You want to drink your meals, have a bar, and take a handful of pills. Supplements, however are designed to s-u-p-p-l-e-m-e-n-t your meals. Not replace them.

Your stack isn't going to get you stacked unless you are eating. Eating not only enough, but also enough of the right macros to fuel and recover. Eating is by far, the hardest part. It's hard mentally for most people. And it's just plain difficult to schedule it in.

Until it becomes a priority you won't make the gains you want. You won't see the progress and you won't get better. Nutrition and nutrient timing is the most complicated part of losing fat, gaining muscle and making transformations in the way our bodies look.

Whether you are a physique competitor or an average Joe/Jane trying to be healthy in the gym, you must get the nutrition right before your stack is going to make much difference. And by all means, if you are a competitor you have to get a handle on this piece.

Getting your food down, figuratively and literally, will change the game for you. You can't make up for poor eating habits by drinking your nutrition. It doesn't work. Take a look at what you're doing. How does it stack up?

Thursday, October 11, 2012

Will Power!

by Kris Pitcher

People get confused about will power. We think it's some "thing" that certain people have, and enact, when it comes to staying on track. I hear it all the time...

"Oh, she's just got such great will power!" As if it were some magic potion or sparkle fairy dust you could sprinkle and shield yourself with. The problem is it isn't any of that.

It isn't a thing, or a shield, or a dust or potion. It's not even so much about your "will" as it is about your "won't".  The whole thought of will is rather passive. But won't, now there's something you can actually do.

What if we thought of it as won't power. The power really becomes yours instead of something you're waiting for to happen to you. Nothings going to happen to you when you're staring down a cupcake. You need won't power.

Won't power is about the choices you make in the moment...in those 20 seconds where you either turn the corner, or you don't. It's not about will at that point, it's about a conscious decision to - won't!

Won't is a choice you can make. I won't have that "fill in the blank" because it doesn't fit my plan. I won't stay up and watch this ridiculous show because it will set me off schedule and compromise my sleep.

I won't skip my workout and shop with the girls after work. Get the idea? It's about the decision you make in that moment. There is no will power in that split moment, there is only won't power.

The power is you making the decision vs. letting some elusive will overcome you and empower you to make the right choice. Don't give it up to will. Take it and decide what you, "won't". The power has always been yours. 

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

This Kind of Sexy Stays at Home

by Kris Pitcher

If you think I'm sexy...you must only know me on facebook. Are you from facebook? It's funny the notions people can get from a tiny profile picture.

Someone recently said to me, something to the effect that it's amazing that I'm always in shape. My husband laughed for me while I picked my jaw up off the floor.

Fat chance! He went on to say, "No, there's just no documentation of her off season body posted on facebook!"  So true! And why would I?!

But to really know me is to know me first thing in the morning. I don't wake like those people on TV...all pretty and made up. I wake up full of CRAZY! Only really special people know me this way.

It's. Not. Sexy. First I eject the ear plugs. They are custom and fit my ears like a glove. I have to kind of dig them out. Then comes the mouth guard...

I'm a grinder, what can I say? Molars, I've cracked 'em. Crowned 'em. Cracked the crowns, and chewed through bite guards. Be careful what you put between these jaws of steel. My husband recently eyed it in it's little container in the bathroom and said, "You can get a new one of those you know?"

It's is kind of ugly. I went on to explain that it was over $350 and I would wear that one until I chewed through it. Insurance doesn't cover it (at $350). They cover crowns (at $1,600). *smile.

Then you need to stand back and get a good look at my hair. Flock of seagulls? Kramer? Ringing any bells? Well, this hair has a life of it's own and you just never know what it's going to do through the night.

One thing is for sure, in the morning it looks like squirrels have made a home in there. Full of crazy. So, once you get passed all of that (yes, he's a good man to love me) and wipe the drool off my face I clean up pretty good.

If you think for one second I would document that, or most any "regular" day in the life...that would just be self deprecating. And why would I post that on social media?

You can keep my special, profile, moments and think I look like that all the time. Lipstick on and tanned and contest ready. But that's not me most of the time. Most of the time I'm the kind of sexy that stays at home!

Monday, October 8, 2012

On Merging

by Kris Pitcher

You know how frustrating it can be when you're trying to pull out into a congested area from a parking lot or alley. Drivers see you out of the corner of their eye, but look ahead. You have your signal on, you inch out, but they keep closing the gap on you. You try to make eye contact and send the message, "Would you let me in?". No one will let you in.

Now you're the one closing the gap. You have the right of way, why should you let that guy in? Sure you see him with his signal on, but you're trying to make that light and if you let him in you might miss it. Besides, no one let you merge. Don't make eye contact.

This is what it feels like to be different. To be the fat girl. The fat guy. It feels like no one will let you merge. It feels like people must see you but they won't make eye contact.

It feels like there's no room for you and people make a point of it. It feels like it's obvious you don't fit and some jerk has to make it apparent to everyone else around. It feels like you're just trapped there, waiting. It feels like it would be nice if someone would just let you merge.

Being nice in traffic is a lot like being nice in life. And my point is that everyone knows how it feels to be the one struggling, whether you know it or not...now you know it.

So, stop being so mean. Start supporting one another, helping one another, and being nice. Start making people feel like they are important, like they fit in, let them merge.

Stop being so critical of yourself, and of other people. Quit picking away part by part until all that's left is one acceptable ear. Begin to see people for their character and potential rather than for what society perceives as their faults.

Stop closing the gap and start making eye contact. Be nice and let someone merge.



Saturday, October 6, 2012

You Weigh What!?

by Kris Pitcher

"If it's not too personal...what do you weigh?" he asked. We were at a work social function and I am always happy to talk about my hobby and if someone is interested - I'll tell all. His daughter had just competed in the bikini division at the show I was in and his interest was sparked.

Laughing I told him that I was probably about 125.5 on stage. His salt and pepper eyebrows went up in surprise. He asked about off season. I told him I work pretty hard to stay around 145. Shock!

"No offense, but you do not look like you could weight that much!" he said. None taken. I dispelled his statement that muscle weighs more than fat. Please know that 1 pound is 1 pound. Muscle is more dense though. I'll give you that...so yes, I don't take up as much "space" as someone who weights the same, or less, and doesn't carry the mass I do.

He was fascinated. We carried on. He asked about my body fat percentage. Looking for a reference he asked what a typical "fit runner" might be. I laughed. No offense to any runners out there...but "typically" speaking they're the classic skinny fat.

I explained that my 11% would look very different from another person's based on the difference we might have in our lean body mass. So, there is no desired body fat percentage for a competitor to be when she, or he, is standing on stage. It's all about how you look.

All this to set the stage to get to my point. I have no idea what I weigh today. No clue. Thinking about this topic...I wanted to step on the scale. But here it is, so get ready...

IT DOESN'T MATTER. I know I was roughly 125.5 on stage (close to 4 pounds heavier than last year!) and I know that I'm heavier than that two weeks out. But the number itself does not matter.

My goal matters. My goal is to build. My goal is to take advantage of the rebound period to feed my muscles and grow. So I will gain weight. THAT is the goal. Why get on the scale?

I know my "number" will be going up. Why torture my psyche by giving it the slightest indication that the number matters when it doesn't. Two weeks post contest and I couldn't tell you if I'm 136, or 140? Don't know.

I know I'm not 125. And I don't need to be 125. That is not the goal. What is your goal? And how does your number fit into it? DOES it even fit in? Or could you just let the number go and focus on the work?

Allowing the scale to drive your focus is backward in my view. Focus on the work, on the goal and the rest will come. Trust me. Trust you! You'd be surprised how much you weigh...depends on how much weight you give it.

Friday, October 5, 2012

Advice, Be Released!

by Kris Pitcher

What I have for you today is kind of special. A gift even. So, sit back and relax. Here's the advice you've been waiting to hear!

I know you've tried a lot of things. You have made some changes in your activity and in your eating over time. You ask a lot of questions and have learned a lot of new information. But you're still looking for that nugget of news that's going to really be game changing for you.

It seems you haven't liked the advice you've been getting. The blank stares, the justification to just do things the way you've been doing it. So, here's your big nugget - keep doing it your way.

And in the words of Dr. Phil, "How's that workin' for ya?" All you advice seekers have one thing in common - you just want to soak up the advice and keep on doing your old way. You don't want change.

You don't actually want to change your lifestyle? You wouldn't actually want to be uncomfortable? Give up the wine, the cupcakes, the late nights out with the girls? NO! That would be crazy!

You want to keep on doing all of that and still make progress losing weight. Garlic bread? Why not! Everyone else is doing it. Cocktail hour starting at noon? Dessert every night? The kids do...

Consider yourself released from advice seeking! Released! Be free! Stop asking us if you don't want to hear the answers we tell you. The answers aren't going to change.

We're going to keep telling you the SAME thing. Eat clean, do your cardio - yes every day, lift some weights to build your muscle mass, and change your mind set about how long you'll do this. We release you, get lost!

Thursday, October 4, 2012

Chewed Out - Evolution

by Kris Pitcher

A year ago, if you had told me I would of my own free will...give up sugar free gum. I would have slapped you across the face and marched off with my pack of Extra so fast your head would spin.

That was a girl with a pack a day habit. A girl with a mouth full of minty goodness, snappin' her way between meals without a care in the world. That is evolution.

After giving it up for this past prep, I don't think I need it any more. I've experienced the massive disappointment of their "dessert" flavors. Which, taste nothing like root beer float, or mint chocolate chip. Nothing.

Those pieces I did chew. Gas. The sugar alcohols along with the physical gulping down of air while chewing left my belly a bloated mess. No stank you.

And thus another evolutionary mark in my eating. With each contest prep I refine a little more, go back to fewer things, and become a little more discriminatory. Seriously, I would have slapped you.

It didn't start out that way. It's a process, it truly is evolutionary. You give up artificial sugars for a week and you might go right back to it. But give them up for months, and you feel their wrath if you take them in again. Headache, bloating...gas.

I probably won't go back to gluten in glutinous amounts either. I get instantly stuffed up in my sinuses when I eat it now. So, moderation - extreme moderation with the gluten is what I've decided is going to work for me. And alcohol? Still haven't had any since 21 weeks before my contest.

Some things just don't fit in any more. They don't meet the goals. They won't get me to my next level, and frankly I haven't missed them. If I don't feel good when I have them, that's a clue that I don't tolerate them well.

Evolution is my way of refining what my process is. It's my way of determining what works for my body and what I'll go back to following a prep cycle. So, you can keep your packs of gum, I think I'm all chewed out.

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Stink Eye From the Weird Guy

by Kris Pitcher

There is a distinct dress code amongst women at the gym. It looks like this: hat pulled down over eyes, head phones in ears, eyes down, very busy look...or scowl even, across the face.

And guys, I'll give you a hint - the i-pod ran out hours ago, and I can't see anything from under this hat. But the reason I have to wear this get up is I'm getting stink eye from the weird guy.

That's right! And you guys get it too. What is with that guy anyway? Giving everyone the stink eye? Why is he staring? Why is he mad-doggin' everyone?

Now there are certain things in the weight room you just can't avert your eyes to. It's the "train wreck" effect. You can't NOT look. No matter how hard you try. But this guy seems to be following you with his eyes. Like he's trying to follow your workout or something.

I know this isn't paranoia. BECAUSE IT HAPPENS TO YOU TOO! So, I wonder if maybe we're just sensitive, or too sensitive, to why it's happening. Perhaps we think it's about us when it isn't.

Maybe they are interested in our program. Maybe weird guy wonders how it is we are lifting heavier than him. Maybe he's wondering how it is we are making so much progress while his beer belly just keeps getting "bear-y-er".

And maybe he's not just giving you the stink eye. Did it occur to you that he's giving everyone the stink eye?

I'm not saying let your guard down for "weird guy", by all means keep that repellent up. And DO NOT make polite conversation - that will turn into a dissertation you did not carve out time to hear.

Even stink eye guy has a story, and while it may not be one you're interested in...know that you are interesting, captivating and well worth watching. In fact, most people just can't turn away.